In HBO’s latest documentary, ‘Money Electric: The Bitcoin Mystery’, filmmaker Cullen Hoback hunts for the identity of Satoshi Nakamoto, the anonymous creator of Bitcoin. After a series of dead ends, Hoback finally comes to the thrilling conclusion that Nakamoto is in fact just a big bag of rocks.
“It just all adds up,” the documentary makers explain in the film, “If you were just a big bag of rocks do you think people would believe you were behind a trillion-dollar financial system? No, you’d pretend to be a person.”
The documentary claims the big bag of rocks has been there from the beginning and has in fact been just sitting there on the side of the road long before Bitcoin’s inception. The smoking gun however is a series of transactions in 2010 supposedly by Nakamoto that correspond to a Bitcoin wallet held by the big bag of rocks.
“I thought it would be someone unexpected but never in my wildest dreams did I think it would be just a big bag of rocks on the side of the road. Now that’s a twist,” continue the exasperated documentarians on camera, “But if you think about it. It all makes sense. Big bag of rocks… Rocks… Rock, paper, scissors… Paper… White Paper!? Boom.”
The big bag of rocks denies the claims, Tweeting (or ‘X’ing, fine, shut up), “I’m not Satoshi. I’m just a big bag of rocks.” In the documentary itself, when confronted with the accusation that it’s behind Bitcoin, the big bag of rocks just sat there, motionless. The filmmakers take the silence as a damning admission of guilt.
Many crypto enthusiasts (or crypthusiasts as they’re known in the biz) are skeptical of the documentary’s findings. “It’s easy to point the finger at a big bag of rocks because it’s so big and it’s not going anywhere,” lamented crypthusiast Micheal Oblong. “But if you look more closely, I mean actually do the research, it’s clear that Satoshi Nakamoto is me. I am Nakamoto.”
Whilst the documentary certainly adds to the long-running discussion over his identity, until the big bag of rocks shows a conclusive connection to Nakamoto or at least is seen wearing Nakamoto’s clothes, the real person (or inanimate object) behind the illusive innovator will likely remain a mystery.
Satoshi Nakamoto did not respond when reached for comment.