Prince Andrew Just Got Arrested On His Birthday, Here’s What’s Finally Being Done About Epstein

Turns out not much, as always.

In probably the worst birthday present anyone’s ever received, the Andrew formerly known as ‘Prince’ has just been arrested for “misconduct in public office”.

Great! At last! Something’s being done about the insidious pedophile ring that seems to have ensnared every single member of the global elite. Finally, the victims can have some respite knowing that the number of people arrested is more than *checks notes* two. …TWO?!

This is a great day for justi– oh, hold on, I’m just getting news that…

Wait, what? ‘Misconduct’ doesn’t mean abusing children? Despite every headline just saying ‘misconduct’ and letting you assume that means what you think it means? Oh, the arrest is referring to Andrew Mountbatten-Windsor giving sensitive political information to Jeffrey Epstein?

GodDAMNIT.

When are we going to see justice served to these wronguns?

Maybe this is just a pretense to get him chatting and find out what actually happened. You know, like doing Al Capone for tax evasion. Right?

Andrew? More like, ‘An-screwed‘!

Anyway, in other Epstein news, Microsoft founder and billionaire playboy philanrapist Billiam Gates has pulled out (err) of making his keynote address at an Indian AI summit (IndAIn summit, if you will).

A statement from his foundation explained that after “careful consideration” they’d decided that Bill shouldn’t speak “to ensure the focus remains on the [summit’s] key priorities.”

Let me translate that: the heat’s too high. They don’t want publicity right now.

Yeah, that doesn’t look suspicious at all.

Obviously Mr. Gates has denied any wrongdoing but so did Prince Andrew and look what he’s been accused of.

…well, nothing right now. But that’s not the point!

Point is, Epstein seems to be the story that keeps giving us basically nothing and yet still won’t go away.

Here’s hoping this stain continues to stick to all those guilty for the rest of their days and the world will finally has some justice for these terrible crimes.

But I’m not holding my breath.

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