2026 | Wall Street Memes

SpaceX is due for a potential-trillion-dollar IPO, which brings with it increased scrutiny into the company’s internal workings. One revelation from the rocket manufacturer’s IPO filing is that Elon Musk can only be fired by… err, Elon Musk?

According to the document, Elon “can only be removed from our board or these positions by the vote of Class B holders.” Now, if I’m understanding this correctly, Class B is anyone with super-voting shares and because Musk has the majority of these shares, he controls the vote and thus the decision if he gets fired or not.

Related article: Elon Made Head Of Efficiency, Immediately Fires Self

This has all come about because of the standard structure that startup IPOs often take. It’s called a ‘dual-class framework’ and it keeps the founders and other insiders in a separate tier of power (Class B) to the public shareholders (Class A, which sounds better tbh), theoretically keeping everyone happy.

For comparison, Meta has this structure but Tesla has a single share class.

BUT USUALLY the board reserves the right to fire the CEO if they get a bit too big for their boots. You know, checks and balances. For some reason SpaceX has waived that right.

Now only Elon can fire Elon, which would make for a very strange exit interview.

Oddly enough, Musk himself warned about this exact scenario in November last year on a Tesla shareholder call about his pay package, “I just think that there needs to be enough voting control to give a strong influence, but not so much that I can’t be fired if I go insane.”

Not sure why he’d bring that up as an option, but OK.

And again last August, “I think my control over Tesla should be enough to ensure that it goes in a good direction, but not so much control that I can’t be thrown out if I go crazy.”

Well, now we’re all very much hoping you don’t go crazy, Elon, because if that happens at SpaceX, no, you can’t be fired.

But then again… who would be crazy enough to fire themselves? Only a crazy person. So if Elon did go crazy he would in fact fire himself. IT’S A FOOLPROOF PLAN!

Jerome Powell just made his final address as Fed Chair and surprise, surprise… he held the rates as is (between 3.5% and 3.75%).

Now that’s enough on its own to upset President Trump, but Jay Powell also revealed in his speech that he plans to stay on the board of the Fed until at least 2028 when his term expires.

Powell cited the probe into him and the bank as the reason for his need to stay. “I’ve said that I will not leave the board until this investigation is well and truly over with transparency and finality, and I stand by that.” How very handy.

This means JP will have a say in future interest rates and Fed policy. Sounds like the Powell-shaped hole in Trump’s head isn’t going anywhere.

The President responded to the news saying that Powell was only staying because he “can’t get a job anywhere else.” Which is probably true, what company would want to start beef with the most powerful man in the world by hiring his arch nemesis?

As for the rest of the speech, Powell highlighted the need for central bank independence in a subtle dig at the ongoing attacks from Trump.

“We just work directly for the American people,” said Jay. “We don’t think, oh, I want to do this because the president says it’s a good idea, or because there’s an election coming up and I want to speed up or slow down the economy. This isn’t bipartisan. This is nonpartisan.”

Sorry, did I say ‘subtle’? I meant ‘very direct’.

The front runner for Powell’s chair next month is still Kevin Warsh, who just won the backing of a key Senate committee. And since Warsh has already said he’d fight to keep the Fed’s independence, it looks like the Trump vs. Fed cage fight isn’t ending any time soon.

I’ll go get some more popcorn.

This is actually nuts.

So ahead of SpaceX’s potentially $1.75 trillion dollar (USD (dollars)) IPO valuation, back in January the rocket manufacturer’s board approved a pay package for Elon Musk granting him 200 million super-voting restricted shares BUT ONLY if SpaceX hits a $7.5t market cap AND…

…wait for it, this is the crazy part..

… IF HE ESTABLISHES A PERMANENT HUMAN COLONY ON MARS WITH AT LEAST ONE MILLION INHABITANTS.

Fairly standard bonus conditions. Not sure what you’re freaking out about.

For reference that’s roughly the population of Jerusalem picked up and plonked onto another planet.

And this isn’t the first time Elon’s been lured back to a company with a staggering pay package with almost impossible win conditions. Tesla did the same thing, offering him a trillion dollars if the company reached a market cap of $8.5 trillion. Tesla. Guys. Do you really think you can be worth almost double Nvidia’s value? Don’t we think that’s maybe a little ambitious?

And surely a $7.5t market cap for SpaceX is similarly out of reach? Well no. Nothing’s out of reach when you’ve got rockets.

BUT WAIT THERE’S MORE.

This isn’t even the really crazy milestone. Musk gets another 60.4 million restricted shares if SpaceX meets different valuation goals and builds data centers in space with a minimum 100 terawatt capacity.

That’s the equivalent of 100,000 NUCLEAR REACTORS IN SPACE.

So it remains to be seen if these goals will actually be reached. But you know what they say, shoot for the moon, because if you miss you’ll still become a trillionaire.

The OpenAI trial has begun and just one day in, it’s already generating some interesting quotes.

For anyone not following, this is the civil lawsuit in which the richest man in the world, Elon Musk, alleges that OpenAI and its CEO, Sam Altman, tricked him out of the company that he cofounded.

Sorry, not ‘company,’ ‘charity’. The crux of the suit is that Altman allegedly took the not-for-profit, for-profit and Elon now wants the clock turned back.

So just what are these crazy revelations from day one of the trial of the century?

Well, firstly Elon explained that we should be careful about AI because “It could kill us all.” Cool, well, that fills me with confidence.

The Iron Man 2 co-star then pivoted to chatting movies saying, “We don’t want to have a Terminator outcome. We want to be in a Gene Roddenberry outcome, like Star Trek. Not so much a James Cameron movie like Terminator.”

Good point. Other than the existence of the Borg, that’s a very good point.

Maybe the most interesting revelation is that Musk pins the entire existence of OpenAI to one conversation with Google co-founder Larry Page. According to Elon, in 2015 Page said that AI would bring about a utopia but Elon worried that he wasn’t considering the risks.

“The reason OpenAI exists is because Larry Page called me a ‘specieist’,” said Musk to the judge and jury. I’m assuming by ‘specieist’ Page meant Elon was anti AI and pro humanity, not just massively racist against koalas or something.

But how is this retrospective mud-slinging relevant to the OpenAI case? Well, going out on a limb, it seems like Musk is painting the narrative that OpenAI was built to be the antidote to unregulated AI development. That’s why it was originally conceived as a non-profit.

Now it’s evolved into its for-profit form, however OpenAI has courted the US government and been continually looking for ways to monetize its flagship product ChatGPT.

Elon wants a u-turn on that direction and has brought this suit to trial to try and make that happen.

We’ll just have to watch and see if he succeeds or if the Borg really do take over (that’s a Star Trek reference).

A recent court filing has revealed that Paramount plans to take Warner Bros Discovery up to nearly 50% foreign ownership in a step that might create a hiccup for the still pending merger. Gasp!

In the filing, Paramount has asked for a lift of the statutory limit on foreign ownership of Paramount’s US broadcasting. The Ellison-owned company requires billions of dollars in overseas financing predominantly from Middle East investors.

‘Warner Bros’ to rebrand as ‘Warner Habibi’

These investors were essential to winning the bidding war, with the major investment funds agreeing to provide $24 billion for the studio:

Saudi Arabia’s Public Investment Fund: 15.1% of the company.
L’Imad, an investment vehicle backed by Abu Dhabi sovereign wealth fund: 12.8%.
The Qatar Investment Authority: 10.6%.
My cousin Lawrence who threw in fifteen dollars.
Other foreign funds, including some passive backers, which are below 10% so haven’t been exposed.

These investors won’t have voting shares, those remain with the Ellison family and RedBird Capital but it’s unclear how much influence they will have.

The Financial Times suggests it will “provide a boost to their soft power even without voting rights,” and “advances their goal of diversifying their economies away from oil and gas. Gulf states have poured hundreds of billions of dollars into sport, entertainment and tourism.”

The deal is likely to still go ahead with FCC Chair, Brendan Carr calling the merger a “good deal” but no doubt this development will add increased scrutiny for the already closely watched buyout.

And I know I’m watching, there’s just nothing good on Netflix right now.

Ladies and gentlemen, take your seats, the trial of the century is about to begin! In the red corner: it’s billionaire champion of the world Elon Musk! Aaaaand in the other corner: it’s Sam Altman!!!

Yes, Musk and Altman are locking heads in a court case that could decide the fate of AI and therefore humanity…

So Elon’s (civilly) suing OpenAI for not keeping themselves a charitable non-profit as originally intended. OpenAI call the lawsuit “baseless” …but they are planning an IPO, right?

Musk left the board in 2018 and started rival AI company xAI five years later which then merged with SpaceX and now that’s up for a record-breaking IPO.

For Sam’s part, after a public falling out with Musk, OpenAI’s co-founder took over as CEO in 2019 and has been a public champion for the company and AI in general.

In the lawsuit, which begins tomorrow, Musk claims he was “assiduously manipulated” and “deceived” and is seeking $134 billion in “wrongful gains” although he wants those funds to go back into OpenAI. Elon also wants Altman and OpenAI’s president Greg Brockman removed from the board.

We’ll see how things play out but jury selection was already off to a tetchy start with a number of jurors confessing negative views on Musk and Judge Yvonne Gonzalez Rogers admitting that “the reality is people don’t like him.”

Err, we sure that’s not going to sway things just a little bit?

While Sam Altman has yet to speak out on the case directly, Elon took to X to post his thoughts:

So we’ll see how all this plays out but in one scenario OpenAI has a new leader and becomes non-profit again, genuinely changing the course of AI and potentially humanity.

Exciting times.

People are very dumb.

Despite only seeing links to this through Instagram, Facebook and X, it looks like, yeah, this is true as navigating through ‘pay.gov’ you eventually come to a page where you can donate ‘Gifts to Reduce the Public Debt’ via “Bank account (ACH), PayPal account, Venmo account, Debit or credit card.”

I mean, why would they say no to free money?

With the US national debt sitting pretty at $39,074,637,550,015 dollars in money, it’s impossible for an average American to even make a dent in that number. Even if you Venmo’d them a million dollars every day it would still take millions of years to pay off the debt.

ON TOP OF THAT, the money is owed to the public anyway. If you willing pay this, you’re paying twice.

Despite that, it hasn’t stopped people from contributing. According to a Grok AI summary, “lifetime totals reach about $67 million.”

People are very dumb.

Do bare in mind though that that’s a lifetime total and this scheme has been running since 1961. It’s only the Venmo/Paypal option that’s new when it was added in 2025.

Wait, so none of this is news? Why the hell am I even reporting on this?

In what might be the most important thing to happen until the next thing happens, Trump has had another attempt made on his life.

But surrounding this assassination attempt, there are a lot of suspicious things going on, so let’s just run through them here.

So, I’m not going to republish Allen’s manifesto in full. But the main points are that he was very anti-Trump and said things like, “I experience rage thinking about everything this administration has done.”

And I guess this isn’t suspicious in and of itself, but it is weird when compared to the next detail, which is that there’s a photo of him wearing a sweater with the Israel Defense Forces logo on it. Does this suggest a political affiliation? It’s still unclear.

But then things get really spooky when you take a look at this Twitter account:

What the hell? What is going on? Just saying ‘Cole Allen’? Three years ago????

Now take a look at the banner image, look familiar? Yeah, it looks eerily similar to that picture of Trump after the previous assassination.

And it gets spookier still when you translate his username numbers into code a=1, b=2,, etc., and see that it spells out an anagram of ChiefAGI. Crazy. Is an artificial general intelligence probably involved in all this?

Could there be more to this story then? We’ll hopefully find out in the coming days and through the ongoing trial of the suspect but yeah, currently things are pretty weird.

Ngl, I just learned what a capex is…

Tesla’s stock just fell a massive 2.4% as Elon Musk pours more money into spending on AI, robots and chips to snack on when he gets peckish, although shares were back up 4% after the bell so what we even talking about here?

As Elon explained, “We are going to be substantially increasing our investment in the future. You should expect to see very significant increase in capital expenditures that are I think well justified for a substantially increased future revenue stream. Tesla is not alone in this.”

Because that’s the thing, every tech company is building out there data centers right now and the Tesla investors (tesltors if you will) banked on Musk. They voted for him to take the company in the direction of more AI and more robotics. What did they think that wouldn’t cost a bit of money?

And when I say a bit more I do mean more than double but shush shhhh.

So yeah, Elon is all in AI and robots if that wasn’t perfectly clear now.

Where does that leave the EV manufacturing portion of the company? Well, who knows and honestly who cares.

Maybe they’ll combine products and Elon can finally achieve the dream of creating a Cybertruck that’s also actually a Transformer.

From $29.99 to $22.99 a month

Xbox has also dropped exclusive access to the latest Call of Duty from Game Pass so I guess one CoD is worth $7 a month then?

The move makes Game Pass one of the few subscriptions that’s actually gone down recently especially after the price was hiked 50% just six months ago.

Now the Game Pass is worth only 35% more than it was two years ago. …hardly a bargain.

And crucially it’ll no longer have the CoD exclusive release meaning that the people who really lose out are gamers who got the pass for just a couple of months solely to get the latest CoD at a discounted price.

Everyone else though will no longer have to subsidise Black Ops 49 or whatever we’re up to by now.

Xbox? More like ex-box, am I right?

This comes a difficult time for Xbox as many are saying that they’re shit now, oh, wait, people have always been saying that? Oh, sorry, I guess that’s not news then…

For everything Xbox, keep it locked at WSM.

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